Love Story

My life began August 12th 1986, in Iowa City, Iowa. When I would talk about college starting at the ripe old age of ten, my mom would always tell me, that I was made for college, because I had already experienced it when she was in school. Since she was pregnant with me while she was completing Chiropractic College, I went to every class with her and that is where my love of knowledge came from. I was a graduation gift to my Mom.
Getting to the point, I would not be here with such a love of knowledge had it not been for those who gave me life, who loved and filled me with a hunger to know more, see more, do more, experience more, struggle more, and live more. My mom, Ginny is quite an amazing woman. This story is pieced together from her comments to my questions, and things from my memory, either told to me in the past or things I experienced as well.


“Well, here goes nothing, guys”

Right now, at this moment I am sitting at a computer, typing away at a paper for English class, an interview. I am attempting to coherently paste fragments of my parents life together from the one sided stories of my Mom, and the memories I have of stories told by my Dad before his death a couple of years ago.
I stop typing- and look at the words on the screen and ask myself if anything I wrote makes any sense at all.

My Grandparents separated when she was only fourteen years old; during this time she lived with her Dad, and three other siblings. When she was almost 16 when her parents finalized their divorce it was also at this time she moved in with her mother and began hanging out the skating rink.
I can picture my Mom walking into the skating rink in Fort Smith, Arkansas, smelling the leather from the skates, and the stale odor of chips and hundred year old nacho cheese, coming from the concession stand. Going to the counter to get her skates and strap them on and then gliding across the smooth wood. The skating rink was the perfect place for her to go when returning home was not the most favorable option. She had had a hard life and my dad was just the right person to bring her to life. He was always up for something new, and his personality was magnetic and spontaneous, and she was so shy and reserved. he owned the skating rink where my Mom skated, and after awhile my Mom began helping to clean up and put things away when they were closing and pretty soon she started working there to pay for skating lessons, this is when she and my Dad began to grow closer, by working and talking together, but it was hard at first. Dad, being so much older than my Mom, 28 years older, was 45 when they met, viewed her as a kid at first, but later realized that my mom was an old soul.
I asked my Mom how people viewed the relationship between my parents, and she told me that it must have seemed strange to most people at first but no one ever said any thing, and once they got to know them it was no big deal, because they were meant for each other.
“One of my favorite stories is when my parents got married it shows how quirky my Dad was, and how determined my Mom was”

The day before they got married my parents had driven to a lake in Texas and spent the day taking pictures, and enjoying the lake, but the inn overlooking the lake was full for a convention so they had to stay somewhere else.

“Anyway, as I was saying, before I went down a rabbit trail”

Their wedding day was overcast as they went to pick up their marriage license and drive to the Justice of the Peace, All along my mom had been telling my dad that she wouldn’t marry him unless he asked her to, so on the way to get married

He says “well, I guess I better ask you, will you marry me?”

The answer was yes, of course but only because they were already on their way there.
Her wedding dress was as unconventional as they were. It was a reddish-brown corduroy dress with brown poplin trim on the skirt and sash that tied around her slim waist, her long straight hair, was no doubt hanging over her narrow shoulders, there could never have been a more youthful and beautiful bride. Their wedding was witnessed by to truckers who had been married just before them and had stayed because my parents had witnesses their wedding. When they came out of the Justice of the Peace it was raining a lightly, and my Dad being such a gentleman walked to the car got in and reached across the seat to unlock the door and pull open the handle for his new wife. My Mom got in the car and said
“I want a divorce! You can’t even unlock my door for me in the rain and let me in first”

“That wouldn’t have happened of course because neither one of them believed in divorce anyway. But that’s how it started, their life. It was oh so full and amazing, so much so that I can’t even begin to tell everything that occurred in their lives, so I am going to tell you about their love, and how they developed it and kept it for so long without going insane”

Those first few years were hard, bouncing around from town to town and job to job, and having three kids in your first four years of marriage is anything but easy but it was fun, because Dad was fun. My mom said that it was my Dads personality that attracted her to him, his vitality, and love of adventure and life that sparkled in his wide, chocolate brown eyes. Those eyes could melt a soul when looked into, and could guilt you into confessing every sin.

“Every time I remember his eyes I can see the love and compassion for others that was at the forefront of everything he did, and the spark that would light up when he smiled, and I knew that life was wonderful because he was my Dad and he loved my Mom.”
Skating, Walking, and Running were all things that my parents did together to stay active and also to talk with each other, they also spent large amounts of time driving around, just dreaming of things that they wanted to do together.
The house is dark; the only light that shines is the muted glow from a fish tank, shining down on an underwater paradise. The light bounces around the room, and comes to rest on two figures, seated facing the underwater scene, their hands clasped together, spanning the distance created by their chairs. The two sit like this for a long period of time before either says a word, they are content to be quiet together.
They would often watch the fish or turn on the radio and listen to music, my Dad pulling my mom out of her resting spot to dance with him to the music of Bobby Vinton.
Staying up late, reading to one another, be it my Moms’ college anatomy book, an adventure novel, or a sentimental love story, was what encouraged my Mom to pursue reading and knowledge, my Dad backing her up all the way.
It was time like those that kept them afloat when things were hard, and their faith that God would see them through.

“That is the kind of love that I want. The kind that sweeps you off your feet, and keeps grounded at the same time.”

I saw a portion the strength that is contained in my mother when I watched her care for my Father when he was ill, so much so, that he was unable to even lift his own hand, she calmly took care of his every need, it was hard for all of us but more so for my Mom than anyone else. She told me how he had always put her first, and how selfish she had been in the past. She remembered, sometimes after a hard day when she was so tired and worn out, him telling her to put him in a nursing home, because if she didn’t she would soon be sitting there next to him. Mom said that she thought about it once but decided that she couldn’t handle it
“Him being somewhere else”
Away from her and having other people take care of him when that is all she wanted to do. It was hard she admitted, seeing him lying there, unable to move or do anything for himself, when that was so unlike him and his personality, but she learned
“That love is a choice”
You have a deeper appreciation for someone if you have to take care of them.
My Mom said that the best part of her life was
“Marrying your Dad” and that they were “closer than ever” the last two or three years of my Dads’ life, when he relied on her for everything.

“I hope everyone finds someone like that” she said

“Like what?” I asked

“Someone that you can do the things you enjoy, I don’t know, just a soul mate I guess. You know, I don’t even know how to explain it.
Someone you can be quiet with, but you can also have fun with, that spoils you, that- I don’t know, that’s spontaneous. That is solid, someone who will take care of you and doesn’t mind being taken care of”
“I don’t know, your Dad was just…I don’t know it was hard to explain your Dad. I mean, a lot of times he was a jerk, but he was my jerk… he was mine. You need someone that you can love, that will love you back, but that enjoys what you enjoy, and that you can enjoy what he enjoys, and you don’t have to enjoy the same stuff even, you know what I’m saying? But you do... I don’t know how to explain it. ”

“My Mom was outlining her definition of the perfect man, and I was agreeing with her as she tried to articulate her thoughts”

“Find someone that you can be passionate about, what he’s passionate about and the same with you” “Is that all you need” she says after she stops.

“Yes, that’s all I need for now. I am full to the brim with stories, and emotions, I just hope that one day I will discover someone who I can love like that” my fingers slow down and the clicking of the keyboard stops as I complete my interview, and save it for another day.